Pat & Lou Schmid

Bourne House

 

THE WOMAN WHO WAS AUNTIE TO GENERATIONS
OF CHILDREN IN CARE

 

by Rex Needle

 

A WOMAN WHO cared for more than 200 children at the former Bourne House Hostel in West Street has been making a nostalgic visit to the town.

Pat Schmid, now aged 76, was the matron who ran the home for almost 30 years, giving confidence and hope to boys and girls in care who were orphans, maladjusted or had been emotionally damaged by domestic upheavals and marriage breakdowns. She and her husband Lou, now aged 80, who was later appointed master, ran the hostel until it closed and are now living in retirement in Spain.

Their trip to Bourne at the weekend brought the memories flooding back and they were surprised at how much the town has been changed by expansion. But their main call was to Bourne House at No 46 West Street, an imposing stone built mansion dating from 1830 and home to the Bell family of lawyers for almost 100 years. When the last of them, Major Cecil Walker Bell, left in 1940, the house was acquired by Kesteven County Council and used as dormitory accommodation for wartime evacuees from Hull and soon after the Second World War ended in 1945, the building was converted for use as a hostel with places for twenty children.

Pat, a state registered nurse, was appointed matron in 1957 and she remembers her early battles for more staff and improved accommodation but most importantly, her relationship with the children. “I was particularly anxious to establish a family atmosphere to give them stability”, she said, “and this was achieved after I persuaded them to regard myself and my husband as a friendly aunt and uncle, an approach that seemed much nicer than the previous Mr and Mrs, and this family intimacy proved to be highly successful and continued until we closed.”

The children of both sexes were of varied ages from five years upwards, the girls up to 15-16 years old although boys had to leave when they were 11. “To say why the children were with us would take a book to explain”, said Pat, “and apart from those sent to use by a child psychiatrist, we had others referred by social workers although with the full agreement of their parents. Some parents were openly rejecting, preferring to accept the policy of out of sight out of mind and never contacted us unless they were forced to. Others were quite the opposite, writing letters and visiting regularly. These were likely to be the parents of those we termed our short stay children, among them truants, bed wetters, soilers, elective mutes, aggressive and over timid children. Some had a combination of problems while others just had a problem with their weight that often turned into a refusal to go to school so that solving the problem automatically solved the teasing which had created the reluctance to attend.”

Mothering was encouraged among the older girls who took responsibility for their favourite little ones, helping care for them when dressing in the mornings, at meals, at bedtime and whenever there was an outing. It was not only beneficial for the youngsters but it also gave the girls a sense of family responsibility that would be so important in later life when they married and had children of their own. “The accent was on relationships and this was a perfect example of that policy at work”, said Pat.

The work was hard and time consuming for both Pat and Lou and their small but dedicated band of domestic helpers and cooks. The children attended local schools but they had to be got ready on time and there were a variety of daily activities that had to be arranged with attendance at the Sunday School held at the nearby Baptist Church in West Street often followed by a visit to Bourne Wood. There were sports in the summer months, swimming at the outdoor pool, cricket and picnics on the lawn and during the winter there were dancing classes for the girls and an annual Christmas pantomime when the children were encouraged to perform together and individually.

There was also a big tea party at Christmas when all of the children could invite two guests each, either fellow pupils or even teachers from school or friends they had made in the town. This usually meant a sit down meal for some 60 people and the kitchen and domestic staff always worked very hard on these occasions to make the event a success.

“Life at Bourne House was all about relationships“, said Pat. “It was essential that there should be a cheerful and happy atmosphere generally. This was brought about by the interaction of staff with staff and passed on between staff and children. The domestic helpers were very important as the children often formed relationships with them. The full time domestic in particular was essential as she was often used as relief in the absence of a member of the children’s staff. We even gave one such member of staff the title of Auntie Mary because she was so close to the children. There had to be a relaxed, friendly, and dare I say, loving atmosphere in the house in order that the children could regard it not just as a place of containment but also as a home with all that this implied.

“We had about 225 children during my time there and to me, the most important thing we did, or tried to do, was to show them a better way than so many had been accustomed to before they came to us. This was particularly important in the case of the older girls as we had them long enough to be able to shape their lives and sow the seeds that might make them better mothers. I was lucky enough to be at Bourne House long enough to see the fruits of my labour and feel a certain pride that at least some of my girls, as I called them, have married and had families who have been loved and cared for in the way their mothers were at Bourne House.”

Pat and Lou remained in charge until the hostel closed in 1985 but the bonds they established with some of the children have never been broken and they remain in touch to this day.

After the hostel closed, the house stood empty for a period before being bought by property developers who converted it into its present use as a complex of retirement flats and bungalows in the grounds at a cost of £1¼ million and work was completed in 1989.

NOTE: This article appeared in The Local newspaper on Friday 11th August 2006.

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